Learning to love your unlovable parts.

Loving all of you

Sometimes I’m the life of the party, sometimes I’m not.

I value peace, quietude, and solitude at times, but then I’ll blast the radio at home or in my car. If I’m in the mood for entertaining, I’ll call up a few friends and whip up an awesome dinner because I love to cook and feed people; it gives me immense joy.

I also enjoy writing, creativity and design, all talents that require a degree of introversion.

The creative muse within me is leading me to buy an easel nowadays and take a stab at painting.

I can’t wait; I think I’ll start with floral arrangements. :)

Love people, love my own shadow.

When I’ve dispensed enough energy at a social event, conference, networking, hand shakes etc., I’m not afraid to leave, even in the middle of the event.

You see, I’ve learned to honour and be truthful about how I feel, regardless of what people think.

Loving all of you, and knowing thyself, is what gives you an unshakeable amount of confidence.

And yet, there is another side of me that I’m continuing to work on.

For one, I can’t stand awful customer service, or poor logistics. I love order, despise chaos, (although I’ve learned to function calmly and clearly when things go haywire).  Wishy-washy decision making or planning make me livid.  Chicken or fish, like c’mon, just decide.

If I go into a restaurant and it’s not flowing where the ambiance isn’t there and I’m not feeling the love and affection in the food for the customers, it drives me crazy!  A love for impeccable service, quality and efficiency is baked into my DNA, I simply can’t help it.

Go figure, when I was a child my family would put me in charge of decorating our home for the holidays and entertaining.  It comes naturally to me, I love beautiful surroundings, I want people to feel good and to have a welcoming experience.

And no I’m not a perfectionist, hardly, I’ve got a few clutter habits that I’m still working on (creatives tend have that, that’s how we create), it’s just that I love to put heart and soul into all that I do.

I believe that when we strive to live a life of excellence, we send a message out into the Universe of how we would like to be treated.

The drawback of this however, is that I sometimes have a tendency to be a bit too hard on myself in my quest to do my best. I have high standards, and you know what?  I’m ok with that.

That’s who I am, and settling for God’s-less-than-best for me is an absolute no-no.

And just so we’re clear, setting high standards does not mean that one is uncompromising, or inflexible. Au contraire, what it means is that you are aware of your divine worth, the truth about who you are in all of your magnificence.

I share this with you all open-heartedly as a means to encourage you to love all of who you are; even your unlovable parts.

To remind you that your flaws add flavour, that your divine self is expressing and experiencing itself through your unique personality.

You’ll find that the more you embrace who you are, the more people will feel comfortable being themselves in your presence.

Your light will liberate them to let their hair down and just be.

And what a beautiful feeling it is to be a beacon of unconditional love and acceptance to people who desperately need to witness their own light in your reflection.

For that’s how we change the world; by being our divine self and being the change.

Now your turn: Are there qualities about yourself that you have trouble accepting?

OR, need advice?

Do share your heartfelt comments and thoughts with the community on the blog and I’ll be sure to reply.

Cheers to loving all of who we are!

With love,

Abby xo

 

 

The Love Is Real, Even In Loss.

Heart Detox with Natalia

I recently had the honour of speaking with an incredible group of women for the pre-launch of my signature workshop series called the Heart Detox, in collaboration with Moxii Pro; a women’s empowerment organization designed for women to live their lives fearlessly.

A legacy inspired by the founder’s late grandmother, she was a prominent business woman in the Ukraine who secretly loaned women business loans with 0% interest during the fall of the Soviet Union. Her last words to her granddaughter during her departure were, “Every woman should know her worth.”

Natalia has made this her mission and so it only made sense for us to collaborate….Obviously!

That’s me in the picture with the founder, Natalia Popovich, who is nothing short of an earth angel.  I’m truly honoured to have had the opportunity to speak to some of the most courageous souls that I’ve ever met.

Talk about an open-hearted experience as women were willing to stand and speak their truth openly and fearlessly in front of the audience.

The intention of the workshop is to have a conversation without walls, in a safe, loving, environment. 

To create a healing atmosphere for women to identify what is weighing on their hearts and release these grievances, be it in the form of unforgiveness, dealing with loss, past experiences, heartache etc. into the Universe as a declaration that they are prepared to begin their life on a clean slate.

It seems that letting go is a hot topic for many nowadays as we’ve entered a very auspicious time of a massive, Universal Awakening and spiritual cleansing.

You see it in the news all the time where people are beginning to wake up; where they can no longer live a lie.

Such personal declarations are so empowering and liberating, while it clears the path for everything beautiful and prosperous to unfold.

We all know that life can be tough sometimes; disappointments happen, marriages/relationships fall apart, we lose loved ones, friends; businesses tank, and it can be very painful for many. Especially when we hang on for dear life and resist the change when the writing is on the wall.

But here’s the thing, even the charade in our lives has an expiration date.

Because at the core of our being, we are programmed to live in truth.

For that reason, I’ve often believed that we all make an appointment with ourselves unconsciously at a future date, to look ourselves in the mirror and face our truth regardless of what the world thinks of us.

Living your highest, most vibrant self will require you to throw in the towel sometimes to allow something new to unfold.

Life is kinder, more graceful, and fluid when we are truthful to ourselves about what’s working and what’s not.

And those who have the courage to let go when it’s necessary allow their lives to flow with change for their highest good, and for the sake of their evolution.

The most rewarding thing of all, is that the Universe is self-corrective and will replace all loss for the heart that is open. Endings are only new beginnings in disguise.

Yes, the love is real, even in loss. If you look real close, you’ll find it, and this can give you peace.

If we can embrace the fact that we are eternally loved, and that life always supports us in our greatest time of need, we can create space for the miraculous to occur.

Dedicated to all of the courageous women out there, keep your heart open!

With love,

Abby xo

How to Break Free From Our Stories, Paradigms and Patterns.

Woman standing

A transformation, for the record, is not for the faint of heart.

It goes beyond positive thinking; there’s no magic pill, no short cuts, no quick fixes. You’ve got to do the inner work.

You’ve gotta face your yourself. There’s simply no way around it.

It takes courage, discipline, willpower, devotion and a great deal of unconditional love, acceptance, and tenderness towards oneself.

It requires a willingness to see things differently to know that there is a better way. It also requires an intense desire to be healed on the inside, to be free from the shackles of mental imprisonment, heartache, and pain in order to be restored and made whole.

Yes my dear friends, you have to get to a place in your life where you have suffered long enough, where you are so profoundly frustrated, sick and tired to the point that you are willing to let your knees hit the floor in absolute surrender.

You’ve gotten to the point that not even the Self Help books are enough.

That is when the magic happens, in the surrender.

Does any of this sound familiar to you?

You see, when you have come to the realization that you can no longer rely on your own strength and that the stories you’ve been telling yourself are just not working, the power of something greater within you will emerge and begin to write a new one for you.

A story that is brand new, without past conditioning, like opening your eyes for the first time, childlike, pure of heart, full of hope for a better life.

Your journey inward to opening your heart and removing all of the barriers getting in the way of everything beautiful and prosperous unfolding in your life begins.

Close your eyes for a moment and imagine what it would feel like to be free, without the burdens of the past.

Doesn’t it feel lighter and brighter?

There are 5 main things that will place you on the path to sustaining a transformational shift in your life:

1)    Identify your stories, paradigms and patterns

Your story is the script that you keep reciting in your mind that keeps a recurring theme rolling in your life. This theme is illusionary and can lead to your unhappiness. You know this unhappiness at the core of your being, but you can’t break it because of your paradigms and how you see yourself internally as limited, victim-like, unworthy and imprisoned. And so thinking patterns emerge to reinforce your story while experiences occur to support it. A transformation will not happen until one has the awareness of their limitations.  Identify yours and your transformation will begin.

2)    Take a heart detox

Now that you have identified your story, you must find the courage to forgive yourself.  Forgiveness cleans the slate for your life, it clears your heart like taking a detox. You see, the heart is the seat of your soul and breathes life into all that you do.  So if there are blockages or grievances in the heart, it throws you out of alignment with the flow of the Universe.  This in turn creates obstacles and unnecessary struggle. Forgiveness is a process that heals the heart and sets you free while putting you in a state of grace. Find the inner strength to forgive.

3)    Declare that you are a changed person

Affirm that you are changed, whole, and complete. Say it over and over again to yourself, let the newness of who you are in the now shine brightly. This will help you keep your eyes in front of you and it will also keep your heart open to what comes next in your life. Believe it in your heart that you are no longer the same person, share this awakening with those who love and support you, allow them to witness and support the change in you.  I can recall my bestie saying to me “Ab you’re living in another dimension now!” I told her, “Ya I know and I love it here.”  Embrace that you are changed.

4)    Find a support group, coach or guide

You cannot do this alone. You need fellowship or you’ll slip. In my life I’ve been extremely blessed to have a wonderful support group of family, friends, spiritual guides, coaches and mentors who support me along the path. I would not be the woman that I am today without them.  Find your own, and hang out with them regularly to keep you on the path.

5)    Sustain your transformation through your own spiritual practice

Above all else, you must find the willpower to master yourself in order to sustain your transformational shift through a spiritual practice.  For me, meditation has helped me tremendously, but for you it may be different.  I think we can all agree whether you believe in God or not, that there’s something very powerful that gives your life a greater meaning.  Developing a practice that helps keep you connected to your core, will give you strength and grace to equip you in your life.

There is an amazing person inside of you waiting to break free. Will you give him/her the permission to shine forth in all of it’s glory?

The world is waiting for you to show up.

All for love,

Abby xo

 

 

 

 

 

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