Empower Yourself By Transmuting Your Pain Into Something Tangible.

Transformed woman

Ever feel like your life’s spinning recklessly out of control?

I have, and when you’re in the eye of the storm, it ain’t a whole lotta fun.  In fact, it can really feel like a drag with a loss of swagg, sparkle and spunk.

That was me a few years ago.  The palace I built for myself on the sand started sinking, with me in it.

You see, I was shiny on the outside, but a whole lotta chaos on the inside.

And I did a pretty good job of hiding it from the world. Or at least I thought so.

I said all the right things, was overly polite, polished and too nice, for fear that I would rock the boat. I became the self proclaimed martyr that I often dread with an unconscious, secret agenda to be loved. I craved and yearned for approval; I hustled for my worthiness by achieving relative success, meanwhile wrestling with my own inner demons.

The real me was caught betwixt the pain of my past, and the identity that I created for myself in the present.  There was a restlessness within me that kept me up at night tossing and turning.  My soul desperately yearned for answers and guidance.

I longed to be free from the mental bondage that I endured; free to emerge from my internal suffering so that I could finally sneak a peek at my True Self. 

I was tired of battling between what was real vs. imagined in my mind. I was no longer fearful of seeing the truth and so - I surrendered.

The Universe backed me into a corner (it loves making a bold statement, by the way), held the mirror up to me and said “time to deal with what’s eating you up inside beloved, I’ve got a mission for you.”

There I stood naked before myself.  The wounded little girl within me stared right back. She took care of me for the first half of my life, and did the very best that she could.  I evolved into a self-sufficient, capable woman but viewed the world through the perception of my wounded past; I lived in an Illusion.

None of it was real. 

The success I worked my ass off for, the judgments that I made about myself, the stories I had created in my mind – none of it was real. It was all a projection that was fabricated by a false, Identity; my suffering was not real.

“Wow! You mean I made all of this stuff up Spirit?” I asked.  It responded softly and lovingly, and said, “yes my child, let me show you the truth, heal you and then you can teach it to others so they too can be set free from their illusions.”

And with that the healing began to flow through me, while the words just flowed effortlessly, like a river.  It’s like I opened up this sleeping cell within my being, I came out of my coma and alas, the Goddess had awoken out of her sleep.

I couldn’t stop writing, I just couldn’t.  It would wake me up in the middle of the night, even while I was driving, I would have to pull over and pull out my journal.  I wrote feverishly and what reflected back at me on the page was an inner wisdom and gift that I didn’t even know existed.  It just flowed – it just flowed.

And I couldn’t stop talking about it.

It oozed out of me, in every conversation I had. It needed to be shared with those who were willing to hear it.

And while I wrote, I had an insatiable hunger within me to study. And that is when A Course in Miracles appeared.

All of it made sense and it pulsated within my being while truth triumphed, and illusions fell to the wayside.  It was a practical guide to explaining the root and fabrications of all of our illusions - Fear.

Forgiveness then was the key to freeing ourselves of these illusions so that love and light could illuminate from the inside of us.

And the beauty of it all is, by becoming the change ourselves, people would witness this light and finally see their true reflection.

Alas, I was finally shiny on the outside, and a whole lotta’ gorgeous on the inside.

I smiled, and there was a sparkle in my eyes.

I had found my True Self.

With love,

Abby xo

The power of a still mind; What happens when you meditate.

Surrender in meditation

When I was a teenager, my friends would often catch me daydreaming into silence while I put my hand in a mudra pose without even realizing it – it came natural to me.

Little did I know at the time that I was actually meditating. It wasn’t until later in my life that I realized what I was doing.

My spirit was already familiar with this practice, yet over the years as I immersed myself in my busy life, I heard about others raving about meditating.

But being still bored me, and I even thought of it as mystical, lazy, and unproductive.

Boy was I ever wrong.

For the past 2 years I have implemented a daily spiritual meditation practice in the early mornings, and sometimes even in the evenings.

I was also graced with the presence of a Spiritual Teacher by mere synchronicity or fate perhaps, who taught me for months how to still my mind using a mantra and single-mindedly focusing on this mantra to achieve clarity, peace of mind, and moments of union with all things.

I am eternally grateful and blessed to have experienced such guidance while it changed the trajectory of my life, quite literally.

It also activated a sleeping cell and an inner knowing within me to write profusely (and effortlessly I might add) a talent that I didn’t know that I had.

While complete silence of the mind may appear to be impossible to many, there have been a few fleeting moments where I have experienced this, and it’s been complete bliss.

Not to mention the sense of awareness, presence and the expansion of consciousness that you tap into like you’re almost merging with everything.

Pretty cool stuff.

The results have been miraculous to say the least, and I simply cannot function without it.

Yes, I’ve become a meditating junkie, and proud of it.

You see, here’s what happens when you meditate:

When we empty our minds we literally rewire our brains, cells, and heal unconscious, karmic thought patterns that are getting in the way of our evolution. 

Everything from your past comes to the surface whether it be unresolved issues or things that need to be confronted.

This has been scientifically proven, and the merits of daily meditation continue to amaze and fascinate the masses.

Examining our past can be painful to face, but with courage, love, and a whole lot of forgiveness, it can be released so that new thought patterns can emerge in line with the life that you want; filled with more peace, joy, and tranquility.

I like to think of it as a mental cleanse. It purifies our thoughts to align with a higher truth so that we can see with it, and ultimately be the light of this truth.

Yes, meditation has the power to transform your mind, help you to reconnect with your divinity, and ultimately awaken you to who you really are.

It peels the layers of fictional identities away that we’ve created through the ego and gives us a fresh new lens minus our deep rooted paradigms that are often short sighted, linear, fear-based, and so limited.

Stories no longer become reinforced by the mind who becomes more aware. Stress and anxiety diminishes, and a greater truth begins to emerge and partner with us to teach us and guide us to greater happiness, and ultimately more harmony.

And, creativity by the way, is off the charts, and solutions emerge with such ease and grace.

And while I don’t suggest you resist your thoughts in any way as they will continue to surface throughout your meditation, I encourage you to just become more aware of them, observe them as they float by in your mind and allow them to pass through you without any judgement; just pure awareness.

When you do this, you discover that the quiet, still, self-assured person doing all the observing is actually the real you witnessing your smaller self having a momentary experience.

Final thought:

In truth – meditation may not be for everyone, but for those of you who desperately want change and who are willing to try implementing a daily practice starting from even 10-20 minutes a day, get ready to transform your life.

Now over to you?  Do you meditate daily?  I’d love to hear more about some of the benefits that you’ve experienced.

OR, need advice?

Do share your heartfelt thoughts and comments about it on the blog with the community and I’ll be sure to Reply.


Abby xo








The Many Shades of Scarcity.

Stylish woman with glasses

Have you heard?

There’s a subtle scarcity epidemic that’s running rampant in our world and it’s called the 80/20 Vision (a term I’ve coined myself).

This short-sighted, linear perception guides most of our wants unconsciously without even realizing it.

It will make you believe that in order to amp up your self worth that you must acquire more stuff, conquer that next mountain, pursue relationships that meet only 20% of your needs in exchange for approval and a false sense of security etc.

It will misguide you into believing that bigger is better, to the point that you become so bewitched by a shinier, dazzling opportunity that you forgo all the things that make you happy as they show up in your life.

It blinds you from seeing your truth and what’s best for you overall.

It will make you zoom in on the 20% that appears negative in your life, even in the midst of so many wonderful things to be grateful for.

You will find yourself championing, well……nothing, and you will be convinced that the pursuit of nothing is noble and necessary.  That glory and happiness is even imminent when it is acquired.

And while there is such a thing as a worthy pursuit to expand our capabilities, intention is everything because it is the driving force behind every goal.

Today I’d like to explore what truly lies beneath our sacred ambitions, so that we can live more congruently with our core values. This will ultimately bring more peace of mind and a sense of fulfillment overall.

The Course in Miracles states:

Every decision you make stems from what you think you are, and represents the value that you put upon yourself.

And so, when we see ourselves as unworthy or limited internally, we tend to zoom in on the 20%; the things that are missing from our lives because we desire wholeness.

We have forgotten that we are already whole, perfect and complete.

That’s why in many instances, our outer perception tells us that by acquiring that which we desire, will make us feel complete.

This scarcity, ego-based form of thinking is so subtle, ever so clever and common, that it puts us on a relentless chase for more, seeking our significance through attainment.

It also makes us focus on what we don’t have vs. what we DO have, which brings a lot of discontentment, restlessness, and dissatisfaction.

It is this scarcity-based principle that totally distorts our vision to see the abundance that we already have in the present and zoom in on the things we don’t have.

And let’s be clear, there is no clarity in distortion when one is blinded by 20%.

There is only incompleteness that lends itself to our belief that we are not enough without it.

So how can we tell if we have an 80/20 Vision?

Here are 3 tips you can use to identify scarcity tendencies:

1)  By how you feel.

Anytime you pursue something where fear completely takes over (not the fear that expands your horizons) I mean the fear that is crippling to your soul, it’s a sign that you’ve identified with an illusion of some sort.  When something is right quite the contrary, you feel safe and self assured within.  Making a decision on the 20% often only gives you a temporary high, before leading to dissatisfaction.

2)  Does pursuing this opportunity compromise your needs?

For example, if pursuing an opportunity compromises all of your needs that you deem sacred, the things that breathe life and joy into your life, then you may want to question if in fact it is in your best interest or not. A good opportunity should enhance your life, not throw your life completely out of whack.

3)  Does it align with your core values?

You’ll find that when something is not aligned with your core values, you’ll experience a lot of feelings of guilt, which depletes our energy. However, when we pursue things that are in sync with the core of our being, you won’t experience any guilt at all, only feelings of satisfaction and fulfillment.

Final thought:
Anytime you feel that you are lacking, remind yourself that you already have everything you need in that moment, and if you’re gutsy, act as if you had chosen it in the script of your life and that those scarcity-based thoughts are not who you really are.

Over to you:  Does this post resonate with you in any way?

Or, need advice?

Do share your heartfelt thoughts and comments with the rest of the community on the blog and I’ll be sure to Reply.

With love,

Abby xo

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