I am a former people-pleaser, believe it or not.
I care, sometimes a little too much.
For a long time I was too nice, always treading cautiously. I danced around what I truly felt for fear that people would be disappointed in me.
I laugh to myself now at how much I’ve changed over the years, and finally found my voice.
Something magical happens when you let truth triumph. You begin to hear your inner voice more clearly.
It took years of inner work to find the courage and strength to be real, and to speak my truth, no matter what.
This included using the word no more often, to the things that didn’t jive with my spirit, like walking away from a deal that wasn’t congruent with my values. And not collaborating professionally when the energy was not in alignment. I’ve learned that it’s all about honouring my soul’s guidance.
It was a pivotal moment where I made the decision to become my own best friend, to trust my instincts and to love myself completely at the expense of outside approval.
And I gotta’ tell you how liberating and empowering it feels to no longer feel divided within.
To be at peace with yourself is a great feeling.
When you’re in people-pleasing mode, you’re often operating from the wounded self and you end up looking for validation outwardly because you don’t (or can’t) validate yourself inwardly.
This can become a downward spiral of compromise as you negotiate for your self-worth by agreeing to things that insult your soul’s truth. More often than not because you are seeking some form of belonging.
I believe that when your need for connection and validation becomes too strong, that’s when you learn to stifle and sacrifice your voice as a means of being accepted.
The crux of the matter though, is that every time you withhold your truth by not honouring how you really feel, you are not living in the space of your highest self.
Subconsciously you give your power away for the sake of being liked.
But guess what?
You’re allowed to say no just because you want to.
You’re allowed to set personal or professional boundaries without it hurting another person.
You’re allowed to disagree with someone else, and still maintain your integrity and respect.
Empowered living requires that you honour your truth so that you can ultimately live in the space of your higher self from a place of love instead of fear.
Learning to love and trust yourself is vital to your well being and overall development into a spiritually, mature whole person. On this week’s blog I share how our addiction to ‘people-pleasing’ can be detrimental to honoring our truth and soul’s guidance.
If this message resonates with your heart, do share your heartfelt thoughts with the rest of the community on the blog and I’ll be sure to reply.
I hope this message leaves you feeling empowered!